In case you’re wondering why I look a little taller today, it’s because I’m standing on my mommy soap box. Check out Mommy DIY if you don’t want to read my statement, otherwise, read on.
I want to be a good mom, I really do, but I have no idea what I am doing! While I was pregnant I studied parenting literature, questioned other moms, and prepared myself for baby. Lately, people just tell me what to do when I’m doing something wrong… and by wrong I mean ‘different.’
My husband and I have made a lot of decision other moms, dads, and grandparents haven’t agreed with. But seeing as how it is OUR baby, that makes it OUR decision to make.
One of our most controversial decisions is also the decision I am most confident about; I enjoy co-sleeping.
Co-sleeping started out of nursing convenience. I didn’t even have to open my eyes for those night time feedings every two hours. Baby was beside me and my boobs were where I’ve always kept them. But we stopped nursing in December, so why are we still co-sleeping?
As a mom with a full-time job, my son and I don’t get to enjoy diaper changes, messy meals, and playtime together during the day. The greetings he and I share each evening say it all; Wow! I really missed you! We smile, share a tight hug and a hundred kisses to make up for lost time, and get into our evening routine of playtime, dinner, bath, and bedtime. Absent from that list are snuggles which we both really enjoy.
Every evening I put my son to bed in his room. Some nights he stays there, some nights he does not. Some nights I like sleeping without him, some nights I don’t. I do have one co-sleeping rule I follow to prevent abuse of the co-sleep privilege by mom, baby, or dad. Co-sleeping is for SLEEPING!
My son sleeps like a champ. No fussing, crying, or inappropriate activities (and by inappropriate activities, I mean lets-play-with-mom’s-hair-at-3am). He sleeps at night and I think that is a good thing. I thought that was what babies should be doing. So what’s the problem with where he does it? It’s just my bed, not an alligator pit. It’s a mattress, not a box of broken glass. I may not be the mom who knows it all, but I know alligator pits and boxes of broken glass are no-nos. Yes?
Please don’t tell me that children need to learn how to be independent. If that were the case, the first thing I want my independent 1 year old to do is change his own diaper. Self-soothing is less important to me than the smelly mess he can make in his diapers. I also wouldn’t mind if my independent son could learn how to buckle himself in to his car seat (save this thought for another day).
Do YOUR children a favor and worry about being the best parent you can possibly be for THEM. You don’t need to worry about mine. Our alligator pit has a child-safety lock on it.
As I step down from my soap box, I leave you with this thought in closing:
I don’t think I’m a better mom because I co-sleep, but I do think I’m a better mom because I don’t judge other moms for co-sleeping or not. -Me